SINGLE LIFE

   

 Well, so this October I hit one year of single hood! YEEEES! I should be excited as it is an achievement for me! Don't get me wrong, I am swimming in excitement! Did I mention that this one year has gone by without sex? Horrific yeah? Its crazy how this freaky, sensual and exotic era evidently leaves an imprint in sexual beings that have sex with just anyone and the higher the body count then the more prowess you are in the game..... RIGHT? It is a fallacy! Unless you are in the porn business though I'm inclined to think that you have to be sexually compatible to have mind blowing sex. Well, a while back, I used to think going a week without having sex would turn me into a mutant! Then again, the more you have it the more mastery you become? I honestly laugh at those thoughts now. 

    Anyway, reason why I am single is, I had a messed up relationship that drained me physically, emotionally, financially and oh yes! SEXUALLY. The only thing I wanted after the three years of dating and living together was celibacy. I know most people would have opted to cheat in the relationship: I was faithful. Others would have left the relationship and gone all out on various sexual partners to get rid of the negative relationship/energy.... not me. I went the monk way of staying away from any sort of intimacy all together to get back to me. I had essentially lost who I was and as the weeks turned into months, I simply did not see any need to engage. Well, I do feel like I need new sexual lessons though... has anything changed? New styles perhaps? New organs that have grown to add on to the previous pleasure I once knew? Well, seeing that I have no idea when I am breaking my tertiary virginity, I will have to accept listening to my friends stories and watching movies to get the juicy intimate details of the much coveted action.. hence the thrill I so desperately crave for! Oh! My friends consider me to be very freaky... I tend to believe I am! I mean, I am a highly sexual being and my brain understands the world in a sexual aspect. That is how I internalise everything... My lack of the sexual activity doesn't tag me the non sexy brand. So! Why am I single? I did not feel like I am ready to open my mind, brain, emotions and body to someone. I felt it right to heal myself, get myself back in a wholly healthy format then when I feel ready, which I am now beginning to, start going out to meet new people.

    What has this past one year been like? Healing, immense laughter, no jealous sprouts someone constantly checking my phone and accusing me of non existent relationships, no emotional and financial drain. No faking it during sex or lacking the much needed sex drive when you so desperately need it to kick in. This was a sore! Just when I thought it had been a while and I wanted some action or he wanted some some, my body would turn to be the Kalahari desert. When I was by myself, I'd be a flooded River Nile on a very wet season. SAD. People! If your sex drive waits for your partner to leave the house in order to kick in, GET OUT OF THAT RELATIONSHIP! Last I checked, self pleasure is widely exercised even though widely 'detested' and looked 'down on'. C'on! y'all like engaging in this amazingly safe  activity... I digress... Things I desperately missed when single? Someone to hold me at night, to talk to every now and then and cook me a meal when the last thing I want is to enter into the kitchen. Over and above, I embrace this single life.

    I sure am excited to what this new era will beget. We are told, that hurt people attract other hurt people and in the process leave a trail of hurt individuals. I am healed now hence will get a healed person that knows what he wants in life. Also, the relationship made me cautious of the fact that I should never ignore the red flags. Why did I string along a malignant relationship? I thought I could heal him, teach him... carry him through his issues. Truth, that should never be a spouse's work! Let people sort out their issues before starting to date them. They will bleed on and into you otherwise rendering you insane!

    Otherwise, I truly am looking forward to this new age of superb relationships, amazing mind blowing sex, crazy adrenaline rushing adventures and mellow love. Cheers to this new age and happy 1st anniversary of celibacy life to me!